There are few things more terrifying to the average employee than the phrase “surprise drug test.”
However, if you work in an industry where these are common, it’s wise to have a backup plan for just an occasion, you know, just in case your drink got spiked at the weekend or something. While barely a week goes by when we don’t hear of someone famous getting busted for a positive drug or dope test, these tips are sure to help you pass. Just don’t tell your colleagues, unless you want word getting around the office, and back to your boss.
1. Dilution + B Vitamins
Diluting your pee is the most common way of cheating a drug test with experts recommending you drink at least eight glasses of water until your pee runs clear. Some test administrators have become wise to this tactic, though, and many will check the color of your pee to see if you have diluted it. To counteract this, take a few B vitamins before your test. These will add color back to your urine, helping to fool the administrator.
2. Detox Drinks
It’s not very clear how detox drinks work, all we know is that they do. It’s also important to be cautious when trying detox drinks, as they can take a couple of hours to work, the results don’t last for very long, and they don’t work at all for some people. They can also be pretty pricey. Still, if you know you have a drug test on the horizon, it’s worth giving them a try if you have no other choice.
Another good option for those who have been informed in advance of their drug test is substitution. You have a few options here: you can bring a container of a friend’s urine to work, you can make a pre-mixed sample, or you can go the full hog and bring a prosthetic penis to work with you. One thing to remember here is that urine is usually warm, so you’ll want to keep the substitute close to your body. Alternatively, look into a company like Whizzinator and purchase some pre-heated urine for just the occasion.
When being tested for drugs, giving the cleanest sample possible is key. So, try to urinate at least two times before you urinate for the test. Collecting your sample mid-stream is also a good idea, as mid-stream pee is likely to have the least toxins contained within.
This tip may seem a little surprising as it’s usually prescribed to people suffering from painful periods. However, Midol also contains diuretics which encourage you to pee a lot more. The more urine you produce, the more the drugs in your system will be diluted.
Of course, how well the above tips work will depend on the type of drugs you have taken and how long before the test you took them. If at all unsure, it’s best to opt for the synthetic urine substitute and ask for privacy when you perform the test.